Hopefully tomorrow (Monday, August 24th, 2020)

Spent much of the day polishing my introductory essay: “My Aesthetics of Internetism & Self Improvement, i.e., An Introduction to my Diary Blog.” Lost track of time. I meant to alternate back and forth between revising a little here and there and noting here thoughts based on those revisions. Usually I finish a post by…latest 1pm because I do my most intense writing work earlier in the day and most of my non-writing (researching, cleaning, walking Yago, TV…

Ashley talking, I didn’t listen, only heard the sound (beautiful sound by the way… like what…what can I compare it to without sounding cliché? Not that I mind cliché when the cliché is more like timeless truth…her voice is to my ears as butterflies are to my eyes? Sunset? Sunrise? Flowers? Caribbean Sea! We flirted with the idea of seeing how we might plan a move to the Caribbean. That had been my dream… from when I was 10 years old and my father and ex-step mother took us to Cancun and I saw the water of the Caribbean Sea for the first time—from then until I was 21 when life in South Florida led to broke and near homelessness.

 … it’s a “late night…” grad school is back and class went til just past 9 pm (from 6 pm to 9 pm). I like the professor. Phillip Ciofarri .  

What do I like about him? He strikes me as very straight forward. Not that other professors I’ve had aren’t. So I can’t yet say what it is about the sense in which he seemed straight forward to me that is so distinct. He dives right into work and is brilliantly liberal is encouraging an “independent study” style to the fiction course while still encouraging we reach out to him for one on one discourse on our work. I still fail to identify what about it seemed so distinct. Also, his voice reminds me of Al Pacino’s voice. I told him and he then told me a story about seeing Al Pacino at a bar he was at in NY.  

I’ve been thinking about all that I have failed to consider regarding my ambitions to make good money. This morning, to that end, I spent time customizing my email signature…

I’m feeling frustrated because I want to keep writing but I am tired and want to wind down and not stress myself out; I feel like a failure when I don’t achieve a certain degree of work on a given day but we will have better days and days that were not quite as satisfying as others…  

Other things just to note…added to elements & organs/ anatomy of my diary concept—the blog and the books…added to my “check list”—a list of questions/considerations to direct what I write about…established that I will write poem epigraphs for essays supplementing the diary. Established that I will employ techniques of fiction writing to write out my “ideal scene visualizations”—things I want to happen to me, what I want my life and the world to be like… technically autofiction then? Will hopefully talk more tomorrow about “auto-fiction visualizations”— “stories” or situations or scenarios that are not yet “true” and thus not technically autobiographical but which depict what I wish to BECOME real, autobiographical, et cetera. I will discuss the connection between the literary element, the neurological, and the “law of attraction” consideration…again, hopefully tomorrow…  

Leave a Reply

Related Post

%d bloggers like this:
this site uses the awesome footnotes Plugin